As many of you are now doubt aware (all two, great!) then you'll have noticed that I've only drawn 1 piece all year, and coloured a few others.
Generally this can be traced to a couple of things, getting heavily into Warframe, distracting me and moving out forcing me to fend for myself wholesale whilst starting up a business.
Generally though if you desire something and want to do it, nothing should stand in your way, if there's something you want to do you find time to do it.
Ergo, I've hot a slump where I really don't want to draw. Is it that I'm simply exhausted from producing at work, scrutinising my work to the point where I can't proceed, or what the people want to see me draw is not what I want to draw.
I honestly see a fair amount of deviantART users being praised and applauded for pandering to the cheapest common denominator. Where skill is only a fraction of what matters as opposed to what it contains.
I'm tired of pandering, I want to move beyond that crap, I'm not a teenager anymore, I want to create work with depth and designs to awe, not cheap smut.
Or maybe this line of thought is only temporary, just something I'm plucking out in the moment. But I'm tormented by this conflict of wanting to produce for the masses and yet I don't like what the masses like.
I can't seem to find an audience to show my work to these days. Maybe that's the problem, drew the audience, the feedback, the lot of it, create without care for who sees it. But then why draw or create when I already have it drawn internally, it's all already there, it's satisfying to share.
I am a snake eating his own tail, I take and taken from without end.
It's not a productive frame of mind.
The Game that is consuming all my free time...
You know you want it...